Daily Post Writers Block: Experience is the Best Teacher

7 Feb

Today’s Daily Post prompt is to describe the worst teacher you’ve ever had. Since I’m feeling uncreative, as all of my creative energy has been swallowed by building my doom fortress in Minecraft, I’ll make use of this prompt and give you a brief overview of some of the worst teachers I’ve experienced. No names mentioned, since this is the internet, but I should be able to give you an overview of some of these profs (since they were basically all in college) in amusing soundbites:

Prof #1: American History after 1877 (Fall 2007, Sophomore Year)
“Hey folks, I know you’re mostly freshmen and sophomores but I’m going to give you assignments even grad students have trouble with. Got a bad grade? Obviously you just weren’t working hard enough at it. Oh, and that syllabus I gave you? You should probably burn that, because I’m going to pretty much ignore it. To top it all, I’m going to spend way more time on the subject of my Doctoral Thesis than any of you care about, so we won’t get to anything remotely interesting about American History. Have a good semester!”

Prof #2: Intro to Medieval Literature (Fall 2008, Junior Year)
“This is what I’m going to teach you. What I’m teaching you is everything you can read in the notes in the back of the book, but I’m going to repeat it anyway. Attempts at humor and lightheartedness will not be tolerated. Your reading assignments will be godawful prose translations of Arthurian legends that read like bad soap operas. If you try to bring up an original thought, I will squash it. If you want to write an inventive final paper, I will squash it. If you start having fun, you will be squashed. Did I mention my voice is like a cheesegrater in your ears?”

Prof #3: Oceanography (Fall 2008, Junior Year)
“OMG guys! An Icthyosaurus! And weather! The ocean is really neat! The rest of this class will be me reading awkwardly from the slides and putting you to sleep! I was obviously once in a sorority and drank so much I can’t stop talking with enthusiasm! Yay!”

Prof #4: Fascism in Europe (Fall 2009, Senior Year)
“The tone of my voice and my poor grasp of the English language is going to take one of the most interesting aspects of European history and make it so boring you’ll want to kill yourself. Also I’m going to play favourites on your paper assignments, so if you try to write something remotely interesting, I’ll give you a low grade if I don’t agree with it.”

Prof #5: Fiction Writing (Fall 2010, Final Semester)
“Good writing cannot come from genre fiction. You should strive to read and write classic literature and never make any money off of your writing, doomed to teach others or seek other professions. Some of you aren’t very talented, but it’s cute that you’re trying. I’m going to encourage you all to be nice, but make extremely dickish comments whenever I can. This class will become your own personal hell and make you question ever trying to become a published writer ever. And if you have any success? Forget it. Your book can’t be quality literature if it’s successful. I’m a hipster! Woo!”

Remember how sometimes I don’t miss college? This is one of those times. For sure.

 

 

 

 

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